Random Thoughts on Contagion, Gwynneth Paltrow and Germaphobes

by Lian on September 12, 2011

Dear Steven Soderbergh, You don't scare me. I have Purell. Signed, Symptomatic in Pasadena

This weekend, I went to see Contagion with my friend Susan. If you could see me now, you’d know I was making that “whoop, whoop, hands-in-the-air” motion because, “Whoop, whoop! Give it up for two moms getting out on a Saturday night for a movie on opening weekend, y’all!” Not that Contagion is a party, but it was a triumph…  for us anyway.

My moviegoing lead to some Random Thoughts, but SPOILER ALERT, you may not want to read if you haven’t seen the film. Your option, but don’t blame me:

I am no more scared of the Bird/Pig flu now than I was before seeing the movie. I am scared of Jude Law though.

That being said, I’m crossing “Visit casino in Macau” off my 100 Things To Do before You Die list. Cuz, em, it might be the last thing you do before you die.

Contagion is proof that it is impossible for Gwynneth Paltrow to look bad. Even seizing and foaming at the mouth, she still looked good.

I’m more convinced than ever that Kate Winslet and I could be friends. Call me, Kate!

According to the movie, we touch our face like 2,000 times every hour or day or something like that. I’m now trying to  get it down to half dozen times a day, no more. So, no reapplying make-up at the end of the day for me.

I’ll also be giving up: squeezing up next to someone’s face in a picture; having an affair during a five-hour lay-over in Chicago; and sticking my hands in a pig’s mouth.

No matter what the movie, when Matt Damon shows up, I expect him to go all Jason Bourne on the situation. And about 2/3 of the way through, this movie could have used a little hand-to-hand combat.

Marion Cottilard – World Health Organization = Patty Hearst

Every time I see somebody stick a needle into their own thigh, I’m reminded of my bedrest during pregnancy and having to give myself terbutaline shots.  Yeah, tough guys, I’ve jammed a needle into my own thigh, too. Hey, maybe I should win a Nobel Prize?

Now hoarding: water,Wet Wipes, forsythia and prom dresses.

Embracing my Chaos, Lian

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Adrian September 19, 2011 at 4:59 AM

I left the theater thinking, wow, I touch my face that many times?! I’ve got to be more careful. (I was a face-touch counter before the movie.) The movie just fed my psychoses.

I enjoyed it. I didn’t care that the story lines were weak. I didn’t like that Paltrow stopped in Chicago for a nooner. I think the story would have worked just as well without that. It just sullied who she was as though she deserved to die. She could have been just as effective stopping at an airport McDonald’s.

My biggest issue about the movie — what woman on Earth hugs a guy wearing an apron covered in pig’s blood? Seriously?!

William J. September 13, 2011 at 9:21 AM

OK, I am striking this movie off my list.

I liked THE HELP. No foaming at the mouth, just a pie I wouldn’t want to eat but I am glad someone did.


Lian September 13, 2011 at 8:22 AM

Agreed, Cyndi. A lot of dropped storylines ( What did happen to Elliot Gould?) and a complete lack of emotional connection with the characters that did stay alive! I give it a B- .

Kristin September 13, 2011 at 2:42 AM

Needed this giggle from your random thoughts this am. Can’t remember the last time I actually saw a grown up movie, but I am not going to lie, this doesn’t make me want to see this one! :)

Ma schmidt September 12, 2011 at 8:16 PM

I saw the preview. That was enough!

Cyndi September 12, 2011 at 6:10 PM

I saw Contagion last Saturday night too. I think I ate the entire bucket of popcorn during the lengthy previews … thank God because once the movie started, I promptly lost my desire to eat. Lots of foaming, mmmm. Had to look away during the “unveiling” of Gwynneth’s, well you know …

I was pretty disappointed with the movie – too many story lines that didn’t connect well … what happened to Elliot Gould? Did he disappear??

I love a good medical thriller, but didn’t love this one.

mari (Bookworm with a View) September 12, 2011 at 1:41 PM

You had my attention until Prom dresses…. please explain…. I’m clearly out of the loop. HA

Love these posts, I haven’t heard of the movie but I was entertained by this post. Thanks for a few minutes of joy this afternoon!

Jennifer Glazier September 12, 2011 at 12:58 PM

My boyfriend and I saw the movie as well and afterward went to the store, every time we heard someone sneeze or cough we were paranoid that they had some sort of disease. Good movie but I would have liked it better if they hadn’t skipped so much time from beginning to end. Like what about Marshal Law or the WHO response to the kidnapping of their employee. I don’t know I liked it but would have like it more with more explanation of the in between.


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