Pottery Barn and Me: Crowing over Halloween

by Lian on October 3, 2011

Dear Pottery Barn…

Me, my crows and I at Halloween

 

My Murder of Crows.

As is my tradition, I was thrilled to receive your new Pottery Barn Fall catalog. I saved it for an end-of-the-week treat and accompanied my reading with a glass of wine, mais oui.  And there, to my delight and surprise, was a catalog full of crows! Oh, Pottery Barn, how did you know I needed more crows?

Crows on a gate from Pottery Barn. I'm green with envy.

I embraced the crow as my key design element for Halloween 2009, going Goth with my front door and personal costuming in my attempt to win Halloween on my very competitive block. I’ve added to my murder of crows over the years, seeking out sales and steals off season, but your new extensive crow product line is impressive! Crow doormat! Crow luminaries! Crow crows! Be still my black heart.

I know why Caged Crow sings, Pottery Barn. Cuz it's Halloween.

I only hope that your embrace of the crow doesn’t mean copy cats in my ‘hood. I already have a hard time competing with the professional magicians that live up the street.( Yes, actual professional magicians!)  And don’t even get me started on the theme park ride designer that turns his house into a haunted mansion for the night. (Yes, just like that very famous haunted mansion!) But, on my end of the block, my crows have made an impact, along with my dead vines, black candles, and candelabra. Should I be stealing the Pottery Barn catalog out of neighbors mailboxes to insure my originality?

Don’t worry, I wouldn’t do that, Pottery Barn. Because I have something the other houses on the street don’t: Full-Sized Candy Bars!

Bwaahahahaha.

Embracing my chaos, Lian

 

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{ 5 comments }

ako webmail October 7, 2011 at 11:00 PM

With all the doggone snow we have gotten lately I am stuck indoors, fortunately there is the internet, thanks for giving me something to do.

Linda Sue October 4, 2011 at 7:03 PM

WICKED

Mom in MN October 4, 2011 at 2:35 PM

I’m with you on the crows. I’ve been looking for a crow with glowing eyes to illuminate the shoulder of my otherwise low tech scarecrow. Did they have any? I’ll have to check online.

William J. October 4, 2011 at 6:53 AM

I always hand out full sized candy bars. Once a year it isn’t that expensive. I love the reactions of the kids when I hand them out. And if offers me protection all year round. Everyone watches out for me because I am “the dude that hands out good stuff at Halloween.”

Lian, I love the crow theme. I love it so much that if I stole the idea from you I would carry it a little further and had out boxes of Black Crow candy. The right size box would be like a full sized candy bad.

Bill

chpdlivr October 3, 2011 at 10:00 AM

I, too, have embraced the full size candy bars! For years my now 26 year old set up a grave yard, smoke machine and scary soundtrack to greet the trick or treaters. When he returned home after college (another whole scary thing!) he got right back on the Halloween bandwagon!

This year I’m going to miss it all (out of town)…..but I know it will all be pulled off again. I’m just glad we have no professional magicians or Disney employees in our neighborhood!

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